Monday, February 3, 2014

I do...What Next?

 "When are you getting engaged?"   "When are you getting married?" 

These are a few of the usual suspects of questions asked when you tell someone you've been in relationship for a long time. Coming this March it'll mark 7 years with my beloved. As much as the sound of a gorge engagement ring and a magical wedding celebrating our love sounds intriguing, I'm okay with the way things are at this very moment. Don't get me wrong, if he were to ask today, tomorrow or next week, the answer would always be YES, but its the wedding I'd hold off on. 

The idea of marriage is a beautiful thing. It gives me goosebumps thinking of the day that I can take his last name and we can create a beautiful family together, but there's a lot more to marriage than a new surname and procreating. I happened to stumble upon this article that really interested me on the subject that marriage can ruin relationships and this sparked my attention.  

"If you don’t hold your relationship up to the same standards as your potential marriage, then it’s logical that marriage will change things"

Many people always like to think about their life after the big wedding, making plans for the future.  These changes to building a future together can be seriously stressful and have a negative effect on the relationship. Sometimes baby making and house buying create fights that never existed before. I'm no marriage pro, but sometimes you need to step back and realize why you fell in love in the first place. Marriage shouldn't automatically mean you change the way things were before the ceremony. If your not enjoying the build up of your lives together, you'll miss out on so many tender moments. 

I'm 22 years old and I'm thinking about midterms and mimosas not mortgages and maternity clothes. But when the time is right for us, I hope our marriage is exactly the way things are now.

Don't let the title of husband&wife become bigger than yourselves. 


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